Have you ever watched the show “Stuffocated”? I saw it for the first time last night and am still marveling that one three-person family could have over 12,000 pounds of stuff in their small three-bedroom home. The inherent message of the show—it’s relationships that matter, not material possessions—got me thinking about our emphasis on gift-giving (and gift-receiving) during the holiday season. THAT got me thinking about the ubiquitous game “White Elephant.”
I decided to look up its origin. Apparently, in times past, the King of Siam would bestow upon his enemies the “gift” of a white elephant. Because the recipient could not dishonor the king by giving it away or destroying it, and because the upkeep of such a gift was exorbitantly expensive and time-consuming, the enemy would become bankrupt. His single royal possession would consume all of his resources causing him and his family to die.
The extreme clutter in the TV family’s home had become their own species of white elephant, zapping their energy, harming their health, and consuming nearly all of their time and financial resources. Only when the “Stuffocated” team of experts cleared out over 7,000 pounds of stuff could the family breathe freely, focus on one another, and invite friends into their home.
Stuff. Relationships. Relationships. Stuff. What takes priority in our lives?
Both the Old and New Testaments make it clear that, by far, its relationships that matter most. The two great commandments are: (1) “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.” (2) “Love your neighbor as yourself.” (Mark 12: 28-31) So it would seem that three of life’s key questions are: What is my relationship to God? What is my relationship to myself? What is my relationship to my fellow man?
I’m not sayin’ that we mustn’t enjoy giving and receiving at this wondrous time of year. I’m simply suggesting that we remember the primary purpose of life: to grow and develop rich relationships with our Living God, with ourselves, and with one another.
If we start to get caught up in the hurry scurry of the holidays, let’s all remember to take a breath and focus on what matters most.
Lest we fill our hearts and houses with white elephants.
Warmly,
Photo by Flickr (Drain)
The gift vs relationship focus at Christmas is always a challenge in our family. It’s especially an alligator wresting match between my husband and me. One of my love languages is gifts…I love seeking and choosing something that will bring enjoyment and delight to those I care about. It reconnects us (even minutely) with the wonder we felt on Christmas mornings as a child. He believes that for many people it becomes a stressful distraction, obligation and budget killer. We’ve worked out middle ground (for the most part)…but the topic surfaces again every year. I think your post points to some good filters as we celebrate via giving: as long as we give gifts that come from our hearts, don’t dishonor God with poor stewardship and aren’t dishonoring ourselves with obligatory (expensive) gift purches, the spirit of Christmas giving is in tact. Thanks for the post Jory, and Merry Christmas!
BTW, my blog post this week is about last minute, affordable and thoughtful gifts… http://dianemarkins.com/?p=568
What a great post, Jory! I love the story about the origin of the “White Elephant” gift because I spent three years over there (Thailand/Siam) as a teenager when my dad was in the Army, stationed in Bangkok. We know that the gifts we get from our heavenly Father are always good, but this made me think that the enemy of our souls also gives gifts — white elephants, designed to consume our time and resources on things with no eternal value. Definitely a filter through which to look at all the stuff in my life. Merry Christmas, Jory!
Thank you for your great comments, Diane and Susan. (And how cool that you lived in Thailand, Susan!) Definitely something to think about, isn’t it?
Merry Christmas to you both!
Love,
Jory
I was delighted NOT to get a bunch of STUFF for Christmas. I have all that I need except time with my family and happy memories. I can never get enough of those. My Christmas wish came true.
And I know your family loves spending time with YOU! 🙂
I have alot of white elephants. At time im soo busy doing ministries. At time my relationship with the lord is about doing but not being. We have in kenyan parks the biggest elephants but neither do i want white or normal. My primary goal is to spend more time with the lord
Thank you for your comment, Joram. I pray that we can all focus on having a little more Mary in us and a little less Martha! May you continue to gain insight and wisdom.
Warmly,
Jory